I recently wrote about the the main reasons for breakups, which you can read here, and I said one of the uses for that information was to initiate a breakup. I’m going to go a little further on that. If you’ve been conditioned by your partner to believe that by breaking up with them you’re “giving up” or that “no reason will be good enough”, then I hope that I can help you toss those abusive lies to the side and do what you need to do be happy.
There can be an infinite variety of reasons as to why someone wants to end a romantic relationship with someone else. This particular study shows 292 of them. Despite there being so many reasons, they can be grouped into distinct categories (which makes writing about them so much easier). Before I go on, the study is an old one (from 1986) yet the main categories will ring true for some of you 31 years later.
The following is based on information taken from scientific journals focusing mainly on North America with some from Western Europe.
Porn addiction is not recognised in diagnostic manuals nor is it supported by strong empirical data. In fact, reviews of the available science supporting porn addiction show poor experimental designs which calls the findings into question. Scientists have argued that porn addiction is not a medical issue but a moral one and that’s what I’m going to outline here.
A gap exists between the number of orgasms men and women have, especially if they’re heterosexual. Knowledge of this gap has existed, at least scientifically, since 1953 and the gap is still apparent in research from 2010 through to this year. To be specific, the gap is about the frequency of orgasms; heterosexual men say they usually/always orgasm up to 95% of the time while heterosexual women do up to 65% of the time. That’s a significant gap. In this post, I’m going to address some more information regarding the gap and how to close it.
Previously, I wrote about a piece of research based on 20 women and they detailed how they felt about their genitalia; for most respondents, the perception they had was a negative one. You can read that post here. Now, I’m going to briefly explore what may have caused these negative perceptions to form.
I’m going to base this post on a study conducted in 2014. It asked a group of 20 female participants of different races, ages and sexual orientations about their relationship to their genitals. Seven main themes emerged from the discussion which I will present to you. Quick note: although the entire female genitalia is commonly referred to as the ‘vagina’, this is anatomically incorrect. The visible parts of the female genitalia are collectively called the vulva and the vagina is an internal component.
Emotions aren’t entirely internal states of being, they also have external components ranging from the socialialisation by which you learn them, to the social arrangements typically used to manage them. The social aspects of emotions are important to understand, especially in jealousy, as situations involving other people are responsible for it.
With relationships being such a complex thing, it’s not surprising that there are so many factors which make a happy relationship. By no means have I covered absolutely everything here. Nonetheless, there’s a lot of practical information which you can easily apply! A lot of what I’m going to talk about touches on conflict resolution, sex, children and more. Each of these will have their own posts but this is a good starting point for them all. I hope the information I present is useful to you.
We hold many beliefs about romance that are harmful for our relationships, ultimately causing distress for ourselves and perhaps those around us too. It’s going to be good for you to get rid of these assumptions, if you hold them. Be prepared to have false assumptions about love shattered and new, hopefully more useful, understandings put in place.
Friends with benefits relationships (FWBRs) consist of two friends that have sex together without defining their relationship as romantic. They are very common, particularly in adolescents and university students. Between 49 – 62% of people at this age have been in a FWB arrangement. Considering the high proportion of people in these relationships, it’s possible that you may end up in one. Read on to equip yourself with what you need to know!